November 5, 2008

First, please forgive me if you get this message more than once. and forgive me again if the content of this message may be deemed "inappropriate" considering the nature of our relationship. All I can say in my defense is that the time is now.

Ok everyone who knows me understands that I do my best to avoid talking politics. But in this moment, I have a responsibility to myself to speak. Please don't take the subsequent note as anything but my views, my story and my connection to here and now. My thoughts are not revolutionary or new, they may not be profound or enlightening. But they are true. What I have to say does not necessary have anything to do with the content of this space here. But this is my forum and this should be considered a public diary entry.

To all my black people in the struggle and the nosy white people who wanna know what I'm thinking:

I am hopeful. As I sit here on the morning after what has been the most significant election since the founding of the United States, I am a proud woman. Albeit a woman in emotional peril. See, I am not a democrat, I am not a republican, shit I am not even a committed capitalist. I do not believe in the rhetoric, the stories politicians and historians tell about the founding principals of this country. They are liars. This country was not founded on ideals of freedom and democracy. Not for me. Pull back the curtains and we all know that this country was founded on the blood, tears and bodies of my ancestry. Mine! I am an African stolen, toiled and abused by America. I am not trying to be all emotional, spit rhetoric or preach (to the choir or otherwise) but the American Dream has been the majority of African peoples worst nightmare. Historically thats the truth. And that sentiment continues. Even today. That being said. I have never been an American. I have not and I am not. Even today.

My pride and my hope is not for this dream of a new America. America, as it exist can not live up to what I believe it should be. America will never take a political" Hippocratic oath". America (pre or post Obama) will not strive " to do no harm". and it won't fix all it's already done.( Ok, so you figured it out... surprise! I'm an idealist .) And perhaps no government and people with needs and wants as great as those that exist in America ever can meet those expectations, or fulfill that reality.

Ok, so you already know, I don't believe in this government shit but It's been said a million times, that the most important time in history is now . I believe America has made a wise choice to elect -at the very least- a Black "conscious."

While it's certainly only my opinion -Barack Obama is a real living, thinking, person with a soul.

The African is spiritual. There are certain traits and that are - and are not - our nature. That's a fact. Whether or not you believe in this sort of thing, it is understood - while not all Black people have rhythm - we almost all certainly have a soul. And President Elect Barack Obama gots it. I felt it last night as I watched him give his acceptance speech.
I am idealist, but I am not nieve. The Democratic party, Barack Obama, Jessie Jackson, Uncle Al , Oprah, and whoever else you want to throw in the mix cannot fix the collective problems of my community- and maybe Barack in particular won't fix any. Shit, He may even turn out to be the worse president in the history of the United States, a true neocolonialist icon. Hummm... We'll see.

But a quiet storm is ahead of us. (another trait: black people are prophets. White people; jot that down in your notepad .) Perhaps it was the euphoria of the moment, but last night as I reveled in the street with my Brooklyn neighbors i felt the slightest first breezes of a whirlwind.
The Obama story, the fanaticism and excitement, the symbolic significance for the global African community, (did you know they were partying and stirring pots in Senegal..yes! i got that info from an on the ground source!) and the barrier braking imprint on the global consciousness all got to me!
People don't want to admit this, perhaps because the simple dialogue would open a pandoras box of questions america will not answer or maybe because to do so, somehow labels one immediately ignorant, But I will. Yes, I voted for Barack Obama because he is BLACK! And I feel -how I know a lot of people like me feel today. I feel LIMITLESS. Whether locked inside or free outside a crazy political system I am still powerful. Little ole ME!

Before I jump off my soapbox, i'll leave you with this. I went back and forth with a comrade the other day, a diligent, real "community organizer", my favorite "black power gangster -INSIDE JOKE" about my feelings about this election. His basic position was one of understanding (of mine) but also a kind of frustration that he and people who do the kind of grassroots, social justice and Freedom work he does, have failed because people believe that the only viable solution to our problem is through this system, Which of course is contradictory to the freedom movements ultimate goals which are and always have been to be independent and respected and successful in the global world.

Well long story short. My heart is torn. Because I am Freedom loving. However I had a thought, which I hope wont be considered a cop-out or anything less than a way to articulate what pride feels like. The honorable Marcus Garvey - would have celebrated this moment for what it is. I believe that Africans in America needed this moment. For me and countless other people like me , this a moment of esteem building, and a tangible reminder of the possibilities of our greatnesses and abilities.

We will not all be a Barack Obama (when we finally grow up:-), we will not all like Barack Obama and most certainly we will not and should not all suddenly pledge allegiance to a corrupt system - because now it has a black face. But we will, even the most revolutionary among us- poke out our chest a little more in the coming days and walk with our heads a little higher. Even if to push only a little harder for our own freedom agendas, we must be inspired. Whatever side of the question you find yourself on with regards to the election of Barack Obama. you must admit that friend or foe, Barack Obama is a mighty tool...and he's Black, like us.


real talk.
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